I had never wrapped my mind around the fact that so much of what blocked my ability to run was my brain, not my body. That seemed like a foreign concept to me initially, something that had no relation to my perception of running. Running meant pain in the feet, knees, calves, thighs, throat, and lungs! That’s always been my rationale to stop. Not because my brain says otherwise! I was wrong.
When I began this journey I used the Couch to 5k app, it was a nice ease in to the process – allowing my stamina to build. However, I had the cues of the program to tell me to walk and run. I’d fight with myself saying that I couldn’t make it – but I trucked through because I knew so many people who had great success as a result of using it initially. I became reliant on those breaks from pounding on the treadmill – just a brief moment to not run full on. I became very accustomed to those chimes and the (almost forced) requirement to finish.
I don’t use the app any longer, so all bets are on me in respect to continue trucking at an appropriate pace.
THAT! is the hard part.
It is so easy for me to say “Oh! Well! That’s close enough that I won’t feel too bad about stopping!” or “I have all of these other things which also need my time!” True. But I really just want to get off. The benefit to the entire process to me is the glowing feeling afterwards. The “YES!” moment. I did it! I can do it! I’ll do it again!
When I jump off the treadmill early, I know I’ve robbed myself the entire pleasure of that high.
Today I ran three miles. I didn’t feel good. I was hungry. I was tired. But, I ran. It was faster than I normally can. But I’d be a liar if I didn’t say that three times I wanted to hop off before I was done with my goal.
I was rewarded with my daughters displeasure of hugging me when I’m sweaty. Good job, Mama!
